Does thinking about a committed relationship with this person excite you? Is not knowing where you stand with this person causing you stress or worry? Are you ready to receive an answer from him, whether or not it’s the answer you want?
“Hey, I wanted to chat with you about something. Want to meet at mine tonight? I can make that spaghetti you love. ” Or, wait until the two of you are casually hanging out together in a quiet, safe space. For instance, start the conversation when you’re in the living room, hanging out on the couch.
“So funny, my mom asked if I was dating anyone exclusively last week. So hard to explain modern dating norms to a parent, haha. ” “Hey, I was thinking. We should talk about whether or not we’re being safe. I don’t mean to pry, but are you having sex with anyone else? I need to know for my own health. ”
“Honestly. . . I’m just going to say it. I’m feeling pretty nervous right now. "
“Hey, I just want you to know that I really care about you. Are we dating? Are you my boyfriend?” “I want to be honest with you. I’ve been curious about whether or not we’re exclusive. Are you dating other people?”
“I don’t want you to feel pressured or anything. We’re just two people talking. I promise not to judge you. Whatever your feelings are, I’ll accept them. "
“I know it might be hard, but I really need you to tell me the truth. Even if you don’t want what I want, I’ll be happier in the long run if you’re honest with me. "
“I get that you really enjoy hanging out with me and don’t want to lose me, but that doesn’t answer my question about whether or not you want exclusivity. " “Speaking honestly about your feelings can be so hard, but I still really need that from you right now. " “If you need time to think, that’s okay. But eventually, I’m going to need a straightforward answer from you. That’s really important to me. "
“I would love to be exclusive with you. I want to feel secure in our relationship and excited about a future together. " “I don’t need that right this second, but I do need to know that you’re interested in the same thing eventually. I’d like for us to keep discussing it, too. " “Let me know if you have any questions for me. I’m an open book! I’ll walk you through my thought process. "
Would you be comfortable continuing to see him when he’s not sure about exclusivity just yet? How long would you be content waiting? “For now, I’d like to keep seeing you. But I do need to know we’ll discuss this again. We would have to have a solid plan going forward. " “Why don’t we plan to bring back this discussion in a month. Would you feel comfortable with that?”
Choose whatever feels best to you. You deserve to have your needs met in your relationship!
