Take time to think through what qualities you most appreciate and what your priorities are. Decide, for example, if you have preference for having a family member like a sibling be a godparent or if you’d rather have a close friend. If political or religious beliefs are of the utmost importance to you, then pick someone with similar views. Similarly, if you would like a person who has a positive attitude or an honest character, narrow down your list accordingly. If it matters to you whether or not your prospective godparent is in a stable relationship or has achieved a degree of professional success, let that steer your choices.
For instance, is there someone more adventurous than you who could take your child out exploring or someone who works in an exciting field that she could introduce to your child? Does one of your choices have an exceptional sense of humor or personal passion they could share?
Prioritize people who are live near to you so that they can be a routine part in the child’s development. Avoid asking people who already have multiple godchildren so that your child’s godparents do not feel overcommitted. Take a person’s ability to assume responsibility for your child into account. For instance, you may want to shy away from asking an aging family member who may not be up to the task or present for all of your child’s upbringing. [4] X Research source
If there are no logistical concerns, do what feels right to you. Asking someone during the pregnancy can make people feel included in your child’s life from the very start and means that they can be involved right away after the birth. If you hold off until after your child is born, it’s often less hectic and gives you more time to make the decision. You can also see how prospective godparents interact with your newborn.
Give your friend or family member a heads up that you’d like to discuss the possibility of them being a godparent for your child. Telling them you’d like to chat about godparenting will allow them to consider what they think about the prospect in advance. You could say something as simple as: “We’re trying to decide who Amy’s godparents should be. We thought about you and were wondering if you’re interested. If so, would you be up for discussing it when we meet?” The other advantage of mentioning this beforehand is that if they immediately react against the idea, you can cross them off the list without further ado.
Consider asking questions such as, “What does being a godparent mean to you?” or “What would you look forward to about mentoring Amy?” Their answers will give you a sense about how they would approach the role. If they have responses that are enthusiastic and resonate with your ideas about godparenting, you are on the right track. Don’t hesitate to ask about their future plans. Some relevant questions may include: “Do you think you’ll stay in the area or are you looking to move sometime down the line?” “Is your company likely to ask you to relocate?” “Will your work schedule and family commitments allow you space to occasionally spend time with our child?”
Godparents are often the people designated to take care of their children in the event anything should happen to their parents. If you would like your prospective godparent to assume this responsibility, say so and ask them how they would feel about it. You could ask: “If Oliver and I were to die in an accident, would you be ready and able to take care of Amy and raise her for us?” This is the weightiest of responsibilities for a godparent, so it’s important to broach the subject. If they’re not willing to step in as a guardian, you will have to find someone else. [6] X Research source
Have a family dinner in their honor. Especially if they’re not a blood relative, this is a gesture that shows they’re a valued part of your family circle. Send them a card with a sincere message. Many shops and online stores carry notecards that are specifically addressed to godparents. If you’re feeling playful, you can write the note from your child’s perspective, to let the new godparent know how much it’ll mean to your daughter or son. Give them a framed picture of their new goddaughter or godson or include a photo in your card. To add a bit of fun, have your child hold a sign or wear a onesie that asks the question for you. Create a personalized gift to mark the occasion. It could be a mug or a t-shirt with a message, like “Best Godparent,” or a piece of jewelry or a key chain with an inscription that they can carry with them as a reminder.
