The cocky, playful alpha guy: “I know you probably get this a lot, but you’re absolutely the most stunning woman I’ve seen. . . " “My friend had to drag me out tonight, but I’m finally glad he did, because seeing you, right here, right now, was worth it. " The slightly shy, bashful guy: “I’m sorry this is awkward, but I get really shy around pretty girls. " “I’m glad you’re still here. I’ve been working up the courage to talk to you for half an hour, and I was worried I was going to have to embarrass myself in front of you totally sober. " The up-front, matter-of-fact guy: “Hi, my name is [name], what brings you here tonight?” “This is the part where I introduce myself and you smile and let me buy you a drink, is that right?” “I’ve been trying to think of an excuse to talk to you, but I got nothing. Can I just tell you an interesting story that happened to me the other day?”
If she brings up subjects that you think might steer the conversation down the wrong path, gently push the conversation in another direction. Saying something that has something to do with the topic, but is funny, light, and might bring a change of topic. If she keeps coming back to the subjects you think are leading the conversation astray, you have two options: Feed off of the energy of that topic, since she seems to want to talk about it. Find an elegant, respectful way to leave the conversation, and instead focus on someone else. A simple “It was nice talking to you” should do the trick.
If a woman says “I have a boyfriend, I’d prefer it if you didn’t talk to me,” just smile, tell her it was nice talking to her, and move on to another candidate. Sometimes life gives you bad lemons. If a woman says “I have a boyfriend,” and leaves it at that, you can say: “That’s fine, I respect that. Do you mind if we keep chatting?” If she says yes, keep on working. You’re making lemonade out of lemons. Don’t assume that you’ll be able to convince a woman in a relationship or marriage to part with her number. Maybe you don’t even want to be that guy. If a girl mentions her boyfriend, you probably want to start looking elsewhere unless your dying wish is to get her number.
If you tell yourself that you need her attraction because your ego can’t take rejection, you’ll be sorely hurt, over and over again, because you will be rejected at some point. Rejection is natural. If you’re so hurt or disappointed because you missed a single opportunity, you’ll miss out on the thousands of other opportunities that await you. Your mental well-being plays an important role. If you are not happy in your life, you will have a difficult time trying to attract a woman. Focus rather on enjoying the moment than on attracting her.
There are many techniques you can use to demonstrate that you’re not needy, but for now the best thing you can do is detach from outcome (see above). Remember: this woman, though she may be beautiful and funny and smart, is only one of a handful of beautiful, funny, and smart in your universe. If she doesn’t work out, another one eventually will. [3] X Research source Don’t shower her with compliments. A single choice compliment to start the conversation is all the woman needs to let her know that you’re into her. Actually, because women are smart, they usually know if you’re into them even without a compliment. So keep the schmaltzy compliments in your back pocket and focus on impressing her with your smarts, your humor, and your perspective.
If she says something that you disagree with, tell her. In other words, don’t be milquetoast. When you disagree, don’t be mean, don’t be offensive; just rationalize your opinion and lay out why you feel the way you do. If you do this in the right way, it’ll move the conversation forward and give you something interesting to talk about. If you’re confident, you can tease her about how she’s not cool if she doesn’t agree with you (wry smile here folks, wry smile). Be composed. Very, very composed. Like the captain, you know exactly where you want to go and everything you say and do has a purpose. Nothing can phase you, even rejection. You expect the best but are prepared for the worst. Why? Because you’re more composed than a Keats poem!
You may it’s helpful to only talk for a few minutes before asking for a number, a dance, etc. That’s because it’s hard to keep up witty, direct, spirited conversation for a long time, even when you’re hitting all cylinders. Don’t string the conversation along without an end-goal in mind!
