Consider asking questions to find out what the boundaries are. Ask, “Is it okay if I call or text you?” Listen to what they say or how they respond. Your ex may be ignoring you at this point, which is a passive “no” in these situations. See if you and your ex wish to remain friends on social media. Ask, “Can we still keep in contact through social media?” If they end up blocking you on social media, this is a sign that they are trying to move on.
The act of saying “no” is not meant to disregard the relationship that you both had. It’s a sign that it’s time to move on for both you and your ex. Even if you’re upset with your ex’s actions, learn that he or she is human too. We all have the right to say “no. ”
Invasion of someone’s privacy is both emotionally unsettling and legally violating someone’s rights. Each person has a right to their own privacy. Once your relationship ends, if you continue to go into their home, text them throughout the day, or follow their every move, this is an invasion of privacy if the interactions are unwanted. If you feel that what you’re doing may be wrong, take a step back and find support elsewhere. Don’t seek out your ex for support after a break-up.
Doing hurtful things to your ex out of spite will likely make you feel worse in the end. Protect your image and yourself in public spaces like Facebook, Instagram, Twitter, and other social media sites. Resist the urge to use social media as a way to vent your heartache. Avoid the need to “overshare” the details of your life on social media. Don’t find ways to “stalk” your ex through social media. Treat your ex’s social media pages like their home, work, or favorite hang-out spot. Though it may be public, it is their private space at the same time.
Stop and think about what you’re doing and how you’re acting. If you’re emotionally overwhelmed, take a step back before deceiving someone to feel better. [4] X Research source Resist temptations to get revenge or “make them suffer” by lying about a situation. Avoid snap decisions that impact other’s lives. When you feel overwhelmed by emotion or are having difficulty with what to do, redirect your thoughts of your ex to positive people or things outside of your relationship.
Talk with a friend or family member by phone or in person about your relationship. You can choose how much to tell them about what you’re feeling. See if they have advice about moving forward. Write in a journal or other private space about your feelings. Avoid using social media for this. Don’t feel ashamed about what you’re feeling. Sharing can help you feel less alone. Everyone has had a loss at some point in their lives.
Avoid trying to get information about your ex’s relationship status through mutual friends. Resist the urge to bad-mouth or trash talk about your ex. Avoid spreading gossip or half-truths. Don’t seek dates with your ex’s friends as a way to simply make your ex mad or jealous. Having a genuine interest in your ex’s friends is one thing. Using your ex’s friends for your own agenda is another.
Grieving a break-up can go through stages of desperation, denial, bargaining, anger, acceptance and hope. These stages may last a few minutes, days, months, or years, depending on your situation. It’s okay to have different emotions, but avoid acting on emotions of anger and desperation. Acceptance will take time, but understand that it is possible to find hope and learn to accept this transition.
Try new things with friends. Reconnect with people who are not associated with your ex. Do something relaxing. Take a hike into nature. Go to a spa. Get a massage. Get active. Exercise at the gym. Take a walk. Ride a bike. Be creative. Use your time and energy to vent your emotions in a positive way. Draw. Paint. Build. Write.
Think about three things you love about yourself. Focus on both your personality and your body image. Use positive affirmations each day. Say to yourself, “I am a whole and worthy individual” or “I love and trust myself. " By loving yourself, you will be better able to move on. You will be less likely to act “crazy” or “psycho,” and instead act “caring” and “loving. "
Avoid assuming the worst in yourself and others. If you have concerned friends, give them a chance to support you. Consider meeting with a close friend one-on-one over the phone or in person rather than in large group settings. This may help you to feel more safe and secure when talking about a difficult break-up.
Talk with a counselor. Find a mental health professional in your community who specializes in break-ups and divorce. There may be options through your health insurance or private pay options. Many counseling centers also offer sliding scale fees. Join a support group. There are many support groups through counseling centers and places of worship. They may focus on relationships, divorce, depression, or other life transitions. Seek medical advice. Talk with your healthcare provider if you have severe anxiety or depression for many weeks or months. Be open about your family’s mental health and medical history. They may offer medication for any severe symptoms.
No one is perfect. Accept that you have faults, and so do other people. But that does not mean that you can’t work towards a happier and healthier relationship for the future. Be positive that love can grow with time and effort.
