Confirm that your security filters are in line with your intent to avoid the person. It may be necessary to remove yourself from social media and close your accounts. You may not be happy about doing this, but there are times when it is warranted.
There are times when you need to gather the paper trail someone is leaving so it can be used in a potential law suit. Documented evidence adds merit to a case.
Explaining your situation may earn some leniency from the school’s administration department.
You can say, “It has become increasingly difficult to be in class with _____ and I need to be transferred out of class. Or he/she needs to be transferred out of class. What can be done about this and how quickly can it happen?” Instructors and administrators may attempt to resolve the matter without removing you or the person from class. Remain calm, but stick up for yourself and make sure your needs are met. Be prepared to tell them exactly why you are making this request.
If you happen to see the person at the distance, simply turn and walk the other way.
Strike up a conversation with someone at a party. Approach a person and tell him, “I’m going to talk to you right now because I’m trying to avoid someone. Is that okay?” Not only will this help avoid the person, you might strike up a conversation with someone you really enjoy.
If you see someone walking toward you that you don’t want to talk to, pull out your phone and pretend to have an important conversation. You can turn your back and walk away. If you are talking with someone and you want it to end simply make a gasping noise and make an excuse to leave such as “Oh my gosh. I have to find my keys. Sorry, I have to go. ” You created your own “out” to remove yourself from an interaction with someone you want to avoid.
Sit down and make a list of the things you learned from your experience. Write about all the positive things that happened too. No situation is all bad.
Report all serious allegations to the human resource department which is there to assist employees settle grievances.
You will be asked to support your request for a change so be prepared. Write down your concerns ahead of time, and bring supporting documentation with you to the meeting. You won’t be the first person or the last person who has requested a change in seating arrangements. This is a common occurrence in any office.
Use your break time to clean out a desk drawer, or get some exercise, or read a magazine. [6] X Trustworthy Source Mayo Clinic Educational website from one of the world’s leading hospitals Go to source Enjoy your own company. Use the time to meditate, practice yoga or write poems, which will help manage the stress you might be experiencing. [7] X Trustworthy Source Harvard Medical School Harvard Medical School’s Educational Site for the Public Go to source
Arrange your own gatherings if you want to spend time with co-workers.
There might be times when you excuse yourself to use the restroom and simply leave without telling anyone. This is acceptable as well. The goal is to get you away from the person you are trying to avoid and remove yourself from the situation. If you leave without telling anyone, text someone you trust who was there to tell them you left. You don’t want anyone to worry about you, especially if you have been in a conflicting situation with someone.
Maintain your composure until the interaction is over. Congratulate yourself on a job well done. Stay positive. Keep things “light and airy,” which means: stay away from deep thoughts, discussions, troubles or complaints if you come in contact with the person. Portray a sense of calm and optimism that can’t be pulled down by the negativity or awkwardness of the situation. Focusing on the positive will guard against being pulled into negative discussions. [11] X Research source No one can take your power away from you if you remain positive. Reacting to an agitating remark will give your power to the other person. You are in control and responsible for your feelings and actions. It is an important job.
If you try to let something go and the situation continues to eat at you, then you likely need to process additional feelings.
If you live with the person you could say, “I need you to know that I’m going to distance myself as best I can from this conflict we are having. I think keeping a healthy distance between us is the right thing to do. Can we agree to stay out of each other’s way?” If they live at a different address it will be easier to manage. You can sever contact by not calling, texting, or emailing. Avoid all interactions.
Plan and hold separate gatherings. However, avoid overlapping events to prevent your loved ones from having to choose between the two. This will only inflame any current friction between you and the other person.
Find a psychologist using the American Psychological Association’s locator. [15] X Research source Find a psychiatrist using the American Psychiatric Association’s website. [16] X Research source
