Don’t get too discouraged if boys don’t always respond positively. Boys are stereotyped at a young age, and are taught to be “manly”, so it may take more time for a boy to warm up to you. Remember that if boys are rude to you when you are just being friendly, it says a lot more about them than it does about you.
Find an activity that you genuinely enjoy. For example, join an intramural soccer team if you like playing soccer, but don’t do it just to meet boys! Boys are everywhere and, though there is a stereotype that they’re only interested in sports, they have a wide range of interests too. So join a movie club or volunteer at the local animal shelter. Chances are, there will be at least a couple boys there who are interested in the same thing and you’ll be able to bond over a genuine shared interest.
If your girl friends ask you why you want to be friends with boys, explain that you are looking for platonic friendships. After all, boys make up about half the human population, so you are all going to need to learn how to interact with them in a healthy and positive manner sooner or later![3] X Research source
Activities as simple as going to the park, watching TV, doing homework together, or hanging out with other friends are all great, low-pressure situations which will gradually develop the friendship.
Though your instinct may be to give your boy friend a hug when you see him, a simple wave and “hi” should suffice. Show that you’re glad to have his friendship by giving small compliments or offering to help him with a class he’s struggling with. Establish boundaries and follow them so there is clarity about the type of relationship you wish to share from the beginning.
Be honest about who you are, such as your interests, likes and dislikes, how you spend your days, etc. Even if you are into more traditionally feminine things, such as baking or crafting, that doesn’t mean you will always be excluded from having friendships with boys. After all, you may even find a boy who is interested in the same activity!
Going with the flow can be as simple as letting go of expectations of what you will do with your guy friends. For example, if you’re invited over to a new boy friend’s place, don’t be surprised or annoyed if you spend the next few hours vegging out on the couch and watching sports.
If you’re already an active person, try taking up a new sport. If you’re a more sedentary person, explore what the latest video games are to see if any of them grab your interest. Even just watching a sport or keeping up with a specific team will give you a lot to discuss with your new friends.
For example, if your friend makes fun of your poor performance in something, you can laugh along to let them know you aren’t too sensitive. You can also poke at one of their weaknesses in a funny way. Just be sure to keep it lighthearted!
With this step, just make sure you are not going overboard. You should still display your natural personality but you can pick up little gestures, such as fist bumps as greetings and common topics that boys discuss and use them yourself.
If other kids accuse you of being in a romantic relationship or otherwise tease you about your friendship, practice some basic comebacks such as, “He’s a friend who happens to be a boy, so what?” If you don’t get worked up about it, eventually other kids will get tired of teasing you and leave you and your friend alone.
Even adults may inadvertently pressure you by asking questions such as, “Is he cute?” Let them know that you are not interested in his physical attributes and emphasize that you are just friends. One study has shown that boys and girls often have a hard time maintaining their relationships because they are pressured to make it romantic or sexual. [8] X Research source If your boy friend starts pressuring you to turn the friendship into a relationship, make it clear that you are only interested in him platonically. If he stops being your friend after that, then he never was really your friend to begin with and you’ll find other people who won’t pressure you into something you don’t want. To keep the connection platonic you should decline romantic gestures, split all the tabs for social activities and make sure not to blur the lines of physical contact.
