Making conversation, cracking jokes, flirting, and in general, engaging people. Remember that popular kids are popular only because they are known by (and get the attention from) others. Remember, if it isn’t yet working out, don’t wait for someone to come talk to you, you might as well talk to others you never did before. You may be introspective, shy, or quiet, but in order to get what you want, you need to change how you interact with people. At first, that might feel like you’re being shallow or fake, but remember that being yourself is, at its core, all about knowing what you truly want out of life.
If you’re hiding behind a pair of gray sweatpants, you won’t get noticed—at least, not in a good way. So, find a look makes you comfortable, whether you look preppy, hipster chic, or grungy, and own it. You don’t have to buy the trendiest clothes that everyone else is wearing unless you think you can really look good and comfortable in them. If you’re buying the same Converse that everyone in school is wearing but they just look wrong on your feet, everyone will notice. Whatever you wear, have confidence in it. Don’t check yourself out in the mirror or ask everyone in your path if you look okay, or people will know that you doubt yourself. It’s great to pay attention to your looks, but looking like you’re trying too hard to be popular is worse than looking like you don’t care. So, if you’re not really into makeup, don’t slather your face with it. If you don’t like popping your collar, don’t do it just because that’s what everyone else is doing. If you want to get trendy clothes but don’t have the budget, check out stores that have cool clothes at an affordable price (especially during their sales). Check out Aeropostale, American Eagle, or even Forever 21 to get some great deals.
Take risks by introducing yourself to someone you haven’t met, going to a party you were invited to (even if you don’t know many other guests), or by making statements that make you stand out in a crowd. If you get used to taking risks (without putting yourself in danger, of course) you will definitely get noticed more.
Part of looking like you’re ready and excited for whatever life throws at you is to smile more. You don’t have to smile like a maniac; however, you should smile when people greet you, or even be the one to smile first. This will make people want to get to know you. If you’re in high school, then you may be at the point in your life where most people around you think it’s cool to look bored or totally uninterested. However, you’ll get noticed even more if you go against the grain here.
Stop thinking about yourself and how you can impress others. Of all the people skills that popular people have, the one that none of them can do without is empathy. How well do you relate to other people? Stop worrying so much about how you look, how you sound, how you compare, and start thinking about how other people are doing.
Keep it casual. Small talk is all about sticking to “safe” topics. Stay away from anything controversial, like religion or politics. By expressing your views on a controversial topic, you’re bound to be unpopular with people who disagree. Keep the topics “light”.
Don’t invite yourself anywhere, don’t stalk, don’t brag, and don’t interrupt. In other words, don’t be annoying.
Remember, the only thing you need in order to be popular is a good set of people skills. The remainder is all yours to mold as you see fit, regardless of what anyone else thinks. Part of being yourself is knowing yourself well enough to laugh at yourself. Show people that you recognize your quirks and don’t take yourself too seriously, and they’ll be impressed.
Joining a team will expose you to more people and will help you learn how to get along with a variety of people that you might not otherwise encounter in your classes or daily life. Joining a team will also improve your social life. You’ll be more likely to make plans for what to do after the game, or to go to pre-game dinners and other activities with your team. Joining a team is also a great way to put yourself out there and to let more people know who you are.
Don’t worry about a club being “too nerdy” for you. Doing something that you love and meeting more people will make you more popular.
If you’re more active in class, more people will know your name and recognize you if you come up in the conversation.
